Almost sure...

They say whatever you chose be sure that you made the right choice.. There is one thing I am absolutely sure about.. I am always almost sure that I am doing the right thing. To be honest I am 24 years old and I have no idea what exactly I want. If you ask me now where do I see myself in 5 years I can surely answer "I don't know". And no matter how immature this sounds, no matter if you say I am a mess or not.. for me it is fine. Cause I haven't seen anything yet to be sure about. 

Things change so quickly, so easily. And we worry about tomorrow so intensely that it does not even make sense. Yes we need to make a choice at the end of the day. Cause we need to decide where are we going to be, with whom, doing what. But aren't we really losing ourselves worrying for who are we going to be tomorrow when we are still trying to figure out who are we today? 

And then you have these voices. Voices from everybody who is acting like he knows what you should   do. How the hell do you know what should I do with my life when I don't even know?? It is easy for someone to judge. To say who you are, what are doing, what are your plans. And then you are tired. Tired of your thoughts. Tired of people around you that are telling you what you should do but then in the end they always say "It is your decision and I am going to be there...or not", so that they can feel better. 

And I am about to write that you should stop worrying about people. People that come and go in your life. That make you feel and then they leave. People that are telling you "if you do this, we are done". People that make you feel responsible for their shit. But I am not going to tell you to stop. Cause it might hurt. But people and the mess they create is what makes life interesting. Just be strong. Just don't lose yourself trying to deal with them. 

24 years old. I may not know what I want, but I surely know who I am. I don't know who I want to be, but I surely know how I became the person I am today. And what I understood from life until now is that there is not right or wrong. There are choices. Every choice you make is part of who you are. What I also learned is that whatever you chose to do you may not be able to do it with passion (cause it might not really inspire you) but you should definitely try and do your best. And challenge yourself. Everyday. Even when you feel that you have everything you want. Go for more. Never settle. But be kind. And let the others say you are selfish. You are just crazy. Crazy for life. 

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. 
Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.
Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.
Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

Mary Schmich


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